‘Ever since your mom died…’
THURSDAY, January 14 – Sander told me on the phone that there’d been an incident at school – that it was something we should talk about tonight. When I got home he said it had all blown over and wasn’t worth discussing any longer.
I insisted. It seems that in English class he’d maintained that poetry was an absolute waste and a couple of classmates had given him a hard time about that statement. Then, a friend of his turned around and said in a loud voice, ‘There’s been a noticeable change in your attitude since your mother died’. At that point , according to Sander himself, he stood up, shouted that he’d had enough, and left the classroom. He then spent a couple of hours in the office with one of the secretaries.
The friend in question apologized shortly afterwards and that was, apparently, the end of the affair. Sander and I talked about what had happened to me. I told him that someone had commented on my shallow complexion, and that people often talk a lot of crap.
We agreed that we’ll have to find a way to deal with things like this since that’s the only way we can get on with life. I also began to wonder whether the change in Sander’s behavior is not only due to the mourning process, but also to the onset of puberty. At this stage it’s hard to distinguish between them. No doubt they’re running parallel, influencing each other for better or for worse.
Diary of a Widower 