Diary of a Widower

Daily entries by a husband, who stayed behind with his two sons

Memories are merciless

FRIDAY, January 22 – Three months since Jennifer and the boys went to the park with Elsa which had been only the third day she’d been taken out for a walk. It feels like three seconds ago.

I remember clearly that around four o’clock, Sander had called me at work. Come right away. Mom’s had an accident. He couldn’t tell me what had happened. Just come home. Now. Okay, Sander, I’m on my way.

It happened right around the corner. In our minds, it’s still right around the corner. What a waste, what a crime, what a ridiculous, absurd, unacceptable, unfair accident. Have we come to understand it? No. Do we realize that?  Sometimes. Are we dealing with it now?  Yes.

We have no choice. The choice was made for us. Three months ago. Three beings that will never forget. The memory will always be there. I hope with all my heart that we will remember the right things. Memories are merciless.

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