Diary of a Widower

Daily entries by a husband, who stayed behind with his two sons

Feeling a bit better, thanks

SUNDAY, March 28 – Are you feeling better, Mr. Overdiek? Have I calmed down a bit and seen the error of my ways? What exactly happened last night?  It was as if you totally flipped. But why?  I wonder if your fit of rage was caused by physical neglect.  That thought was in the forefront of my mind when I woke up this morning, tossing and turning.

I haven’t been taking very good care of myself the last week or so. One evening a lot of alcohol, and the next day unhealthy food and not enough sleep. I haven’t been to the gym in a while and I spend hours at the laptop, frittering my time away. I conclude that all of this is getting me nowhere. The body becomes the victim of negligence and ultimately the mind as well.

So what’s wrong with that – asks the wicked little voice inside my head – in view of the outpouring of misery that is our daily lot ? No, no, that’s not permitted. No way. Maybe it’s not good for you, having to battle the living nightmare going on in your head in which you play a leading role. Yet there’s no sense in cultivating those haunting memories.

We’re on daylight saving time now and this Sunday morning I resolve to devote more time to sport, keep away from nibbles, eat more fruit. That’ll teach the tormented mind a lesson.

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